This is psychotic.

"We are going to WIN guys I can feel it, and I know it seems like there is no light at the end of the tunnel sometimes and that man, it gets so tiring talking to housewives and these snot nosed kids but I tell you what I remember when I first started doing this I never prepared for class and now one of thhe most important things I think that you can do is prepare for class, I mean you do the 'Whats New?" part of the conversation lesson, and then you talk until you can't stand it anymore and then BAM you whip out your lesson and its like smoooth sailing - but I guess maybe its more important to me because I mean, shit its my name on the sign in front of MY business out there so I'm like a little more accountable -"

He was a 26 year old ex-european basketball league player when he arrived in Ichinomiya Japan 14 years ago.

"- than you guys are but I mean it really helps to be prepared with the right stuff when you go in thhere, and oh right, look I know thhe schedules are all heavy right now and we all feel a bit maxxed out but we are going to WIN guys I can feel-"

6 foot 4 and conventionally handsome, bags under his eyes. He shakes his fist and doesnt make eye contact with any of us.

"-I can feel it, we are going to WIN!"

All of the teachers look at eachother with the same desperate and horrified "I can't believe I am working for such a total fucking idiot." look. Ryan, a mid-thirties ex sous-chef from Chicago stares numbly at the full page of red hash marks he has made during out mandatory weekly hour with the boss.

"And I know sometimes it feels like you might have had a bad day,"

Jacek, a massive Pole, 6 foot 3 and stocky who presumably knows my Boss from European basketballing settles in his chair. Even though he is Polish, he is teaching English at our school. We were all instructed to call him Jack, not Jacek. I mean, shit, its just two letters. Jack from Chicago. He is one of the best kids teachers I have ever seen, but there is still something weird about lying to children.

"But remember - you are going to WIN! And God is on your side and thats beautiful."

My boss should know. He is an ordained priest. Well, by mail. I think. He has one of those collars at least. The Japanese like to have white men perform "Western Weddings" in fake churches, and he is a local favorite.

"Oh and Cem, lets talk about your new class - its on Monday nights, a senior citizen at a retirement home, its really just to help keep her from going senile, like therapy. I don't think she really knows much English, but she likes foreigners, and since you are out in Konan City anyways..."

God is on my side, and thats beautiful, beautiful.